I don’t know exactly when it happened, but somewhere along the line, I decided to believe that I was unworthy. To be honest, I could point to a few different times in my life when that happened, but truthfully we don’t need to go back there and rehash that stuff…unless you pour me some California Cab Sauv, and then I’m an open book and get all shares’y. And when I get my hands on you, you will be too 😉
But in any case, there were these tricky times that led me to believe that I was unworthy. I was unworthy of success, unworthy of truly being loved, unworthy of being heard, unworthy of being my true self, the list goes on… And the only way I figured this out was because I kept finding myself in situations where I wondered how the heck I got there…it was like waking up from a bad dream where you settled for things that you would never imagine yourself settling for. Like the things that you would condemn a friend for settling for. Yep, I was a settler. I know, it’s shocking really, since that’s not at all who you know me to be… but that’s what makes this story so awesome. And I hope it helps you realize how simple it is to turn your life around from where you woke up yesterday and asked ‘what the?!…. how did I end up here?!’ to literally creating whatever you can imagine for yourself.
What I’ve learned, and am actually obsessed with in my private coaching, is that everyone at some point has a belief that they are not worthy. And if you’re saying ‘oh, I KNOW that I’m totally worthy’ … sorry Boo, you’re likely the person that is finding herself in more situations then you can count, where you are being taken advantage of and giving your energy away like it’s air. It would seem that it’s a right of passage for our crazy ego to convince us that we should down play our strengths, we should give away our power and we should people please.
This was a seemingly little thing that allowed me to reach the next level of success…and it still blows my mind.
A few years ago, as I was building my successful health & wellness business I was diving deep in to personal development and literally looking everywhere for the answers as to why I wasn’t achieving the success I could see for myself. I was in the middle of Savasana in my hot yoga class and the instructor was talking about setting intentions for the class and having affirmations to support them. Intentions aren’t new for me, but when she said ‘I am Worthy’, I decided to try it on… as soon as I said it I had tingles up my arms. And when I said it again I may or may not have teared up… and when I said it a third time, well, I don’t need to get in to it, but it was kinda of like a ‘I’m not crying, you’re crying!’ moment with my soul. In that moment I knew that this was something that was triggering me and that I needed to address it. I had the clarity in that hot room to see that it going to be this seemingly little thing that would allow me to reach the next level of success that I was looking for… and it still blows my mind that I saw it.
So I committed to telling myself that I was worthy. I’d like to say that it was easy and that I never questioned the words that came out of my mouth…but I’d be lying and this homie don’t play that. All early 90’s hip hop slang aside, I often felt like an imposter trying to convince myself that I was in fact worthy of whatever it was that had prompted me to remind myself of my worthiness factor. But I had the tingles & emotions every time I uttered the words, and I just knew I had to keep doing it. I said that 3 worded affirmation every time I practiced yoga, every time I went for a massage, every time I shared a business opportunity or every time I looked into Michael’s or my daughter’s eyes and felt their love. Here was this random affirmation that I didn’t think I needed, that was slowly but surely starting to change how I saw the world, or more accurately, started to change how I saw myself in the world. And let me tell you something pretty magnificent. When you start to see yourself differently in the world, you start to show up differently. When you do what you repeatedly say, you all of a sudden start to experience your words in real time. I met people who were eager to talk to me, I was offered opportunities that hadn’t been available to me before, I took better care of myself, I took better care of the people around me, I started to experience growth in all areas of my life and business and finally saw that I was worthy.
‘I Am Worthy…’
And so, if there is one thing that I encourage you to start doing NOW, it’s saying or writing ‘I Am Worthy’ daily. It doesn’t matter how you start, how loud you speak, or how messy your writing is…. just start and watch your world change before your eyes.
And if you’ve already been down the road of discovering, embracing and owning your worth, yay for you!! I’d love to hear what the catalyst was for you to step in to that powerful place… you never know who else is looking to be inspired in this community and you, my lovely friend, might just be their ticket to embracing their worth.
Please, share your lovely light below.
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Very inspiring blog about affirmations! I went through a challenging experience of abuse from men I was sexually assaulted by a few different ones and I was in that negative zone of unworthy. when I started life coaching I found my worthiness by using affirmations and knowing I am amazing person regardless of what I went through I am able to help others in New Zealand. Thank you for your amazing inspiring blog bless you! ?
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